5th Passage Hand, 10,157 CA, Sulport

Born in Sulport, the daughter of Hersius and Sayen, younger sister to Emmerich, 23 years ago, I write this journal in hopes of finding myself once again.

I have just returned home after almost of year of being gone. It was strange to return here to my village, and those whom I have known since a child, were surprised to see me as well. I shall write of my story, of how I have ended up back here.

My father is a brute of a man; cunning. He was once of Ar, but I believe he still is somehow connected. My mother has spoken at times of his secrets when I was younger.

My mother is ruthless; a half-breed of the Savages. She hates me. She has hated me for some time now. She will not admit it, but her demeanor when I came to my teen years made it obvious. I could not understand why then.

It was mid-summer a year ago, when pirate ships landed and attacked our village. The men of the village fought valiantly, much booty was taken. I was once such piece of booty.

Rather naïve, sheltered by my brother in our youth, only hearing whispers of such things, such men, my eyes were opened quite widely. I had spent my life, testing my limits with my brother and his friends; these men showed me those limits with efficiency. I lived among them for a month, two months, though I had not seen much of the day's light; kept in the kennels until I was called for.

Then one day, a Merchant arrived at the compound, a rather unscrupulous fellow. I was sold to him, after he had spied me serving amongst the others that evening. His name was Reine. I hated him, yet I suppose I loved him too. He was kinder than the pirates, but he held me in such perfect control. He had taught me, in time, things of his business to help him, and I did so with much joy. But he had his weak side too, and for that reason, I yearned to be back among those men who had first taken me.

It was not to be so.

We were nearing a village, where the Merchant decided he would brand me after all. However, during the time at our camp while I prepared our meal, he had gone off, apparently in clandestine meeting with another. He did not return until the darkness had grown thick, surrounding. I noticed his stagger, and then he fell. He had been gutted, but he still lived; barely. He was in pain, and reached for the collar of his I wore, unlocking it, letting it fall. He then asked me to see the end of his life quickly. I could not! I cried, pleading with him that he would be fine, but I knew he hurt, knew his wounds terminal. At his stern command then, his last words spoken, I took his knife and ended his pain. My hands now remain stained with his blood…

I took the wagon, we were but a day and a half from Sulport. I was afraid, and angry, and aching with the loss of one who made me understand in totality what and who I was. And so upon my arrival, no marks to reveal that I had been enslaved, I had been taken in by my father; my surprise to see my mother chained to his couch. I let them believe that I had fallen into the river, attempting to hide, and carried off, that I remembered nothing of the events, taken in by a peasant family and nurtured to health.

I learned that my brother had died a hero that day I had been taken. My mother, in her despair, maddened by it, ran off one day, meeting then her fate of capture, of finding herself slave, of loving a man other than he who was my father. My father found her, purchased her, and kept her his work slave. His pleasure slaves torment her.

I leave next Hand, on a journey for my father. He has provided me an envoy of escorts; Marius, the friend of my brother and myself. Julius, the older brother of Marius; I do not like him. Telrik, Bartok and Murdoch as well, good men I think, but I distrust their loyalty.

Our journey will take us to seek trade between smaller villages and Sulport. I have no clue why my father chose me to take this journey.

6th Month, 1st Hand

We have begun our journey. Marius seems fidgety about something. Julius broods. Sometimes, I drive the wagon, other times I am curled beside one of my father's men there on the wagon box. They don't like me sitting there for fear of bandits, I suppose. But I like to watch the scenery as we pass along. We reach the first village tomorrow.

6th Month, 2nd Hand

We have visited already three villages; towns, I suppose one or two might be called. One of these, was Ar's Station; we had to cross the river by barge to reach it. That was terrifying, yet thrilling for me. I knew what dangers lay within those waters.

There, Julius and Telrik met with a man whom I noticed was a Slaver; it was impossible not to know, his flagrant dress in those colors of his Caste. I was immediately frightened of course, I but a woman among five men; they could say anything to my father. I believe they are too loyal, however. I was also curious too why they would having such a meeting; the trade was only in the trade of fish and other supplies.

6th Month, 3rd Hand, Day 2

Our travels have gone well these Hands. We have departed Harfax, and are reaching the close of our journey almost and are near the grounds of the Sardar Fair. The Fair will be closed; there will be no need of remaining there.

Intentions are to return to two of the villages we had previously before returning to Sulport; one being Jort's Ferry.

Why am I suddenly fearing more?

By my calculations, with yet a handful more villages to stop along the Vosk, as well as the re-visiting of two, we are already late on returning as I had presumed we would long before the start of the Sixth Passage Hand. Now, it seems we shall not return home until perhaps in the middle of Se'Kara itself. If that is so, I will not have the chance to visit the Fair of Se'Kara.

I am not pleased.

6th Month, 3rd Hand, Day 3

Something Julius said to me today bothered me. He said my father was not expecting us to return until the end of the season. Which means, if we left within a day or two, in order to arrive home before Se'Kara, the arrival of the autumn season, we would not be making further stops. I wonder why. Too, Julius mentioned my father expecting me back; why would he not expect so?

I met a woman today at the spring; a kajira. She was butchering a poor fish. I showed her how to properly descale. Her name is Thalia. For some reason, we seemed to connect right away. She was, of course, uncomfortable to be around me as she was naked. She is a good kajira, well trained, unlike my father's wenches. She is a woman once of the high Caste of Scribes; she told me of her story of walking a high bridge. It was how she had been captured. She is so like me! Adventurous.

We spoke of our once-intended Companions… I confessed to her my own slavery. I did not, however, tell her that the Merchant died by my hands, that last final stroke. I only revealed he released me before his death. That much was true. I fear any learning that I had ended his life, despite that his wounds were already terminal. I fear I would be killed for it. I don't know why I revealed such dangerous information to her. For some reason, I do not think she will betray me.

I look forward to her company again. I have to be careful, however, her owner is a Warrior — of Ar. Or was. Thalia told me that he is only related to the city by the insignia only; he is an outlaw, perhaps mercenary now.

Is this coincidence?

This evening, we met again, and Thalia had informed me that her Master had invited me to dine with them this evening as thanks for my help earlier. My guards, of course, followed; I would not have it any other way. I was not a fool to be a lone woman in the presence of one of the scarlet caste.

It seems though Thalia had been remiss; her master had no idea of this invitation. I was a bit suspicious of the kajira then.

6th Month, 3rd Hand, Day 4

We have been deterred; a broken wagon wheel forced us to camp outside the ground of the Sardar Fair. I was concerned that we would be yet further delayed in returning home.

The men are working on fixing the wheel now. I spend my days about the grounds themselves, a spring I had found. It's beautiful there. Of course my guards are not happy I slip off as I do. Julius found me at the spring there; it's secluded and beautiful. He reprimanded me for being too adventurous for my own good. I suppose he is right, but one only has one life to live, it may as well be an adventurous one.

6th Month, 4th Hand, Day 1

I have not been very faithful in my recounts. Sometimes, I think I simply cannot bear to write on paper what I feel; that growing unease and fear. I continue to meet with the kajira to talk. She and I have grown quite fond of each other. We are much alike I think more each day.

Julius has disappeared. Marius will say nothing. Telrik and Bartok as well. Murdock speculates he is hunting.

I am suspicious. I have told Thalia my fears.

6th Month, 4th Hand, Day 2

I suggested today to Marius that we leave without Julius; surely something must have detained him that wasn't good. We should leave quickly! Marius grew angry with me. I have not seen Marius this angry in a long time.

Telrik hunts for tabuk. I look forward to fresh meat for a meal tonight. I hope he is lucky.

Thalia and I met again today. I told her that one of the wagon bosk had been slain in the night, and that Marius did not feel it was a beast for the gashes were too clean, as if a blade of some sort had severed the thick muscle. There is much to be suspect. I believe Julius is behind all the problems we have encountered. He means to keep me here for some reason.

The Fair will open in two Hands; Marius seems to think we will remain its entirety.

6th Month, 4th Hand, Day 4

Now, the other bosk ails; I think it has been poisoned. Bartok does not think it will survive the end of this Hand. Marius will not tell me anything of Julius still. I grow angrier with him.

I confronted Marius on another issue, something of which in sorting out particular events, I had concluded; my father's guards were in consort with those who would kill my father while I was away. But why hold me here? They had plans for me, as well, I was certain.

I hadn't seen Thalia today, and so I headed to the camp of her owner to look for her. Telrik indeed had returned with a tabuk and I had told Bartok to deliver part of the beast to Helios for repayment of the meal I spent with them. I wanted to be sure it was done; Bartok was a bit slow. I neared the tent and heard several voices.

I saw that Helios and Thalia had visitors; a suspicious looking man and his slave. I had my guards with me; though I had ran through the trees and gave them near heart-attacks, they had caught up and were not very happy with me. Helios had spied me and invited me to join his fires. Helios, later, offered me his protection, she having told him of the slain bosk. This other man, I did not like him. There was something about him… His slave was very rude; had he not suddenly sent her off I would have demanded her beating for her rudeness to myself.

6th Month, 4th Hand, Day 5

The ailing bosk seemed to be coming around. I was curious at that. I wondered what poisons could be administered by my men to make yet another delay in our return home. Still, we had to wait to purchase another bosk in order that the wagon be easily pulled lest we sill the remaining bosk.

Thalia and I spoke of our Pilgrimmages to the Sardar; she never made hers.

I had been informed earlier that morning by Marius, that bandits had been seen near the fair. Informing Thalia, Helios had decided to pull up stakes. I have snuck off with them and travel with them now on their journey to Corcyrus. I do not trust Helios, but I trust him more than my guards right now. He plans to be Ubar, he chides. Perhaps he will be.

6th Passage Hand

We have arrived near the gates of Corcyrus. We have made camp among the trees. Plans to return to the Fair upon its opening we will venture back there. I wonder how my guards are taking my disappearance.

7th Month, Se'Kara, 1st Hand, Day 1 – The Sardar Fair

We have arrived at the Fair. I found my men still at the wagon. Marius was angry; Julius had returned. Julius demanded to know where I was, whom I was with. I wanted to demand the truth from him. I said nothing to either. Julius asked if I had gone off with Thalia and Helios. He wanted to know of things they may have told me of themselves; perhaps the kajira entrusting her master's secrets to me without thought. I told him nothing.

Marius took me aside. He said my father was alive — and in Ar. There was a meeting at the wagon that evening; it was commanded I come. I would not be there, I knew this. I would hide.

I left the wagon to enjoy the offerings of the Fair. Marius found me later. He whispered things he could not tell me in front of Julius and the other men. It seems that my father intended upon my return to sell me to the Slaver we had encountered at one of the villages. Julius had apparently discovered this and that too, my father intended to betray Sulport to Ar; it had to do with the river treaty. I so hate politics, I do not truly understand much of it. My father has fled back to Ar.

Marius asked me to be his Companion; I rebuffed him. I could not be his Companion! He would know what I had been. Though I loved Marius, I supposed, like I would that of a brother, I did not feel those stirrings when I neared him.

I cannot go home I do not think.

I found Thalia later, and informed her of today's events. Even she said I should not go to the meeting tonight.

I am not a fool.

7th Month, Se'Kara, 1st Hand, Day 2 – The Sardar Fair

I had hidden in my tent, remaining there in the dark shadows, hearing Marius and the other men call out looking for me. They did not tear open flaps of tents; most likely they would not wish to face steel should a tent be that of a Warrior. I stayed in my tent until mid-day, certain they were long gone. It is good to be back in the fair, around people, though I don't much involve myself with them. Too many suspicions may arise toward me. Thalia and I had further discussed the situation back home. She agreed that my return to Sulport would be dangerous.

I noticed a man there; a dark stranger. Dangerous. I dared not look at him. Too much.

7th Month,Se'Kara, 1st Hand, Day 4 – The Sardar Fair

I saw Julius today. He did not see me.

I met a woman, a Ubara. She was grand looking in her veils and robes. A kind woman, she extended an offer to visit. Though I was suspicious of the offer, I made her feel as if I might take her up on it. Another woman I have met there, and she and I have become somewhat friends; she is amusing. One of her slaves approached me to beg I free him. I care not for them; they are not real men.

I was at the spring today drawing, working on this journal. That dark stranger appeared there; startled me. I thought surely things would bode ill for me that day. But he didn't remain long, only warned me of dangers. I did not tell him the truth of myself; he asked of my guards. I was scared, so very scared. I could not tell him the truth!

I wondered if Julius had seen me, and this stranger was with him, in consort with him.

I bought a carving of a kaiila today. I gave it to Thalia that she give to Helios; I told her to consider it my payment of her services to me. She was excited.

I lay here tonight, eating a bit of chocolate. It had fallen from the dark stranger's shirt today, falling to my pack. I thought it was intentional, and said nothing. I ran into him later. He accused me of theft. I realized then he meant the chocolate. I dared say nothing then, he would think I stole it and made up the nonsense of it dropping. I had never tasted chocolate before. I gave a piece to Thalia. The last piece… I am saving.

Day One, Third Hand, Camerius, 10,165 CA, Minus

The Saga Continues

Ayelen My life has taken far too many twists and turns, my journal grows thicker each day. I have gone down many a twisted pathway, have experienced the highs of life and the lowest of lows; I have faced Death and slept in his arms, rescued so that I might live another day and grow stronger.

And I have.

There was one point in my life, one of those particular high points, that involved a man by the name of Weslon Delmalcre. What I would give to see him again…

Eventually, time passed and I had become a respectable citizen of Minus. It was while there that I had wandered into the marketplace and was reunited with Weslon, the man who knew me more than any other before, or after, him. Our reunion was bittersweet, but unfortunate circumstances again left him leaving me behind. This time, I decided I needed to put him out of my mind forever in order for me to find happiness in life again.

Time Frame be Updated

Full Circle

I have come full circle and need now to focus on myself, of finding… me. With a workshop to tan hides and manufacture a few items, and returned to my Sentinel, that cottage and lighthouse perched on the cliffs of Victoria, perhaps in time, I can stop thinking of myself as broken, and feel again…

 

 

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Special Note

Because of the differences in publishing the books, depending upon whether published in the U.S. or Europe, depending upon whether a first publishing or a Masquerade Books release, page numbers will often vary. All of my quotes are from original, first-printing U.S. publications (see The Books page for a listing of publishers and dates) with the exception of the following books:

  • Tarnsman of Gor (2nd Printing, Balantine)
  • Outlaw of Gor (11th Printing, Balantine)
  • Priest-Kings of Gor (2nd Printing, Balantine)
  • Assassin of Gor (10th Printing, Balantine)
  • Raiders of Gor (15th Printing, Balantine)
  • Captive of Gor (3rd Printing, Balantine)

Disclaimer

These pages are not written for any specific home, but rather as informational pages for those not able to get ahold of the books and read them yourself. Opinions and commentaries are strictly my own personal views, therefore, if you don't like what you are reading — then don't. The information in these pages is realistic to what is found within the books. Many sites have added information, assuming the existences of certain products and practices, such as willow bark and agrimony for healing, and travel to earth and back for the collection of goods. I've explored the books, the flora, the fauna, and the beasts, and have compiled from those mentioned, the probabilities of certain practices, and what vegetation mentioned in the books is suitable for healing purposes, as well as given practicalities to other sorts of role playing assumptions.