Is Living as a "Real" Gorean Possible?

The following are my personal views, thoughts and opinions on this subject that I have carried with me and believed for these many years I have been a part of online Gor. It is not my intent to offend, but simply to offer a different perspective and perhaps clear up some questioning of my commitment and love of Gor. It is never my intention when I make a post to offend anyone; I certainly don't like to be offended and it's just not my style to treat others with such disregard.

To me, just as you can no more paint the world with a broad stroke of a brush and say that every person is the same, neither can you do so with their opinions, perceptions, beliefs and idealisms. That is what makes each person unique and special. Each person harbors that basic undeniable human right to possess them, for that is what makes each person, molds them into their being. Some turn out all right, some not so all right; God is still working on me.

I also feel that you cannot judge a person; simply by the reasoning that no person is God. But mostly, because people perceive other people differently.

Often I have heard talk of a certain person as being a terrible person, but once I got to know them, realized they were not terrible, just shared different views than that of my other friends.

Too, you can't like everyone and vice versa; that is human nature. But just because you or someone else doesn't like another person, it doesn't make them a bad person. Ironically, people often will speak highly of serial killers, "He was such a nice man" "He was such a quiet, gentle person" with the great concensus formed by peers that thought they knew that person as a generally good person.

Just as we humans err, our judgments too can be just as erroneous. Too, within a group of two people, concerning recounts of experiences and so forth, there are three sides: person one, person two and the absolute truth.

It is for that reason, that I don't accept the accolades or negative comments of others as biblical, but rather seek to form my own opinions of people by talking with them and getting to know them. I like to be proven wrong about an initial perception, at least in the good way, and often I have.

Some legalese first: The terms "Master" shall also be read as "Mistress" and the term "slave" shall be read as referring to both "male and female slave." Use of the masculine gender deemed to include the feminine and neuter genders and use of the singular shall be deemed to refer to the plural, and vice versa, whenever the context so requires in order to simplify this essay.

Can "Gor" be lived realistically in the real-world? Fully and completely, at least in the philosophical sense, on a permanent basis?

No, I don't believe it can. I do, however, believe that certain practices of the Gorean philosophy can be lived on a short-term basis, and with much compromise and negotiations between all parties involved.

It seems that lately, "living Gorean real-time" has become the newest fad. Not everyone that lives, or attempts to live, a Gorean life in the real world is doing so because it is the new in thing to do, but because they truly believe in the "philosophies" of "being Gorean." But, I also believe there are those that are attempting such a life because they see others doing it.

Gor is a world that is anthesis to most civilized nations on the planet of Earth, which is where we live in reality. Gor… Gorean… is not a true lifestyle. Lifestyles are realities, based on very real cultures in the very real world. Gor is a fantasy world, and it should always be remembered that it is, plain and simple, a fantasy; thusly there can be no true Gorean culture. Gor is not simply a world made up of ancient civilizations and their practices, but is a compilation of the realities of ancient civilizations, with only bits and pieces of such realities utilized.

Gor in its entirety works in the books because it is a fantasy world. Merging fantasy with reality without being able to distinguish the two will get you a permanent bed at the loony-toon hotel. Unfortunately, I've met too many that fall into that category.

John Norman will tell you that he himself is but a man of Earth, and not a Gorean man, as far too many have deemed him to be and view him as a demi-god. Neither does John Norman live a Gorean lifestyle, something he has been explicit in repeating in his various essays and letters. However, he does believe in the simple truths of nature, the natural order as it is said in his books.

I myself have read a few psychological profiles that have been put together by alleged psychoanalysts who have read his works, not just his Gorean works. Most of them claim the man reveals him to be in actuality, a woman-hater, with deep seated anger issues regarding women.

Considering all that I have read, I have my doubts on the reliability of those claims, but even if it were true, I suppose, however, it far better he direct his anger-issues and fantasies by writing books, rather than how many there are in the real world that do play out their monstrous fantasies.

I do, however, believe that one of the biggest contradictions is the following statement that I have heard often: "Gor is about the celebration of the beauty of women. Gor values women."

In that celebration of the beauty of women, and the love of women, is the right of the master to kill his slave for whatever reason he may have, be it that she be displeasing for example, and, even if he simply has the whim to do so.

However, I do believe that Gor in its concept is truly a beautiful thing for reasons far too many and deep to even attempt to try to put my thoughts into written word.

I think perhaps the practices and fantasies of Gor can work in the real-time world, if it only the very basis of the natural order is accepted, that the more harsh aspects are but a fantasy or of a nature not legally acceptable in our world, perhaps some aspects used as perhaps a part of erotica and foreplay. It would have to be safe, sane and consensual, which would make it a modified Gorean lifestyle, and not one directly that the book depicts and allows.

There is also the legal issues. Slavery, whether forced or voluntary, is illegal in most of the civilized world. In fact, in the United States, basic human rights are undeniable, and cannot be waived away, even if you believe you are waiving them away. Once you decide you no longer wish to play that consensual slave, you have that undeniable right to halt it.

Should your partner tire of Gor in the real-time world, but you want to still play master and forbid your slave to end the game? and lift a whip, not as a part of erotica, but to truly beat your "slave" because she displeased you? In a court of law, such is considered physical abuse and, well, you stand a good chance to play master and slave in a whole different way should your partner decide enough is enough.

You are a master; you tire of your slave and no longer want her. Do you sell her? Or are you going to chomp her up and throw her to the rodents? A real man of Gor would. You are angered by your neighbor over some dispute. Are you going to walk over and skewer him with a sword? A real man of Gor would.

You're a female. As a free female, you are still beholding to the rules of men, and are only seen as potential slave meat. You still cannot truly do whatever you please, however you can own things, such as property. As a slave, you are lower than a dumb cow that does nothing but chew cud, defecate green patties and squirt milk; you are an animal and not considered human; you must do everything you are told, like it or not; you must sit by and watch your master be sexually active with as many females as he wants; you are a worthless slut; you may be allowed go to work and earn a paycheck, but you cannot spend the money, it is not yours, everything you own belongs to your master. A real woman of Gor would accept all of that knowing there is nothing she can do to change it. Men own the world. That's the cold, harsh facts of Gor.

As a slave, you are an animal; simply property. You cannot own anything, but too, you cannot claim family, for once you are a slave, you have no family. That is the right of a free person. Certainly upon learning of your lifestyle, your "free" family would shun you.

There are, however, already panther girls out here in the real world. Well. Sort of. Gloria Steinem maybe.

We won't go into the child molestation laws, as Gorean slaves most always began the sexual side of slavery once they reached puberty. But, that, again, is true Gor.

These are the points that must be held in check by legalities and human rights, making a Gorean lifestyle not completely a "true Gorean" lifestyle as the books would have it, but rather a "modified Gorean" lifestyles.

Perhaps there are women who could sit by and watch her mate sexually active with other women and be comfortable with it; I have known women personally who claim they can and do, but I have seen these same women also suffer the jealousies that plague the human spirit. And perhaps there are women that would continue their careers and happily turn over their paycheck to their partner, who would happily let a man decide what will and will not be done to their bodies, who care to own nothing in the world, who would not care that their names are not on that deed for the home she lives in, who cannot even claim a piece of dust as her own.

I do believe that living Gor in the real-time world is something that has to be muchly discussed between all parties involved, and an understanding of all that is expected of each person openly voiced. Although we may enjoy Gor in the virtual world, and embrace much of the philosophy, there are those that can see the beauty of what Gor can be. We are all still of Earth, we are all raised with particular morales and beliefs that we cannot, as humans, toss aside and expect them not to resurface. I have seen someone cry out in virtual chat to remember there's a "real person behind the screen," yet turn around and try to play out "real Gor" with their partner and be uncaring of that person's earthly, human feelings that we are all bred with. That sort of contradiction is a part of the distruction of this truly beautiful world.

It's always fun to live out one's fantasies, for a short time anyway, and as long as no one is hurt in the process. Too, fantasies play out and new fantasies are born. And finally, and most importantly, it must be remembered that people often live out, play out fantasies in order to rise above the mundane aspects of reality. If your fantasy becomes your reality, then where do you go to escape the mundane aspects of your new reality? I know that for me, and for others I've spoken with as well, the distancing of fantasy and reality must be there, because if not, the chances of losing the enjoyment of the fantasy is too real, especially since fantasy lived in the daily routine of life tends not to work out exactly as fantasy works — in fantasies.

Can a Person be Serious about Gor and Not Live the Lifestyle in Real-Life?

And, can such a person truly understand the extent and complexities of that which is the culmination of the philosophies that is Gor?

It's something that I have seen discussed, and there is always a great degree of dissention on the subject. Die-hard lifestylers often feel that those who do not as they are, are not earnest or serious, or love Gor as much as they do.

My answer to the question posed? Absolutely. Living the lifestyle may instill yet deeper the philosophies of Gor, but to say that just because one doesn't live it in real life, they love it less. How can you measure love? Truly?

There are various reasons why a person may not live a Gorean lifestyle.

Perhaps they have a spouse or significant-other who may not even chat online, let alone do any sort of roleplay, be it online or even tabletop, that might lead them to happen upon Gor. Or perhaps that spouse or significant-other is simply not interested in the subject, or is not in agreement with the philosophies of those common in Gor.

Perhaps a person doesn't want to lose their fantasy escape(s) by drawing them into a real situation.

Perhaps there are children involved or other family obligations and responsibilities.

Perhaps there are medical reasons; physical and/or mental. Without a doubt, a person must be healthy physically, as well as mentally and emotionally. Both persons need to be free of such disorders as alcoholism, et al, and bi-polarism, while treatable, still could affect mental capabilities, just to name a few.

I know many that fit all of the above, and then some.

For myself, I fit several categories. The most prominent being that my husband is not a chatter online, has no interest in roleplay of any sort, and while harboring some of the basic philosophies that man should be dominant over woman, the thought of lifting a hand to strike a woman abhors him, and there are indeed medical issues involved. I have children, family, who would not understand, and I value them more than life itself to lose them.

Lastly, though far lesser in comparison to the other issues previously mentioned, the online is my escape from reality, from the stresses of everyday life that can wear me down mentally and physically. When I enter the online world of Gor, I can lose myself in my fantasies, while being around a group of people I respect and adore, who share similar views and fantasies.

While I know many who suffer physical ailments and live the lifestyle, and manage to do so, there are limitations that must be set in that lifestyle.

While I personally do not feel that Gor can be lived realistically in the real-world, or at least fully and completely with the inclusion of the laws that are found within the books (i.e., concerning the rules of property), I do feel that at least on the philosophical sense it is possible. While such lifestyle is impossible for myself only, my circumstances of life, and I would never begrudge others who do so; in fact, I rather congratulate those who acquire such a lifestyle successfully.

I think what irks me are those that are fad followers, those who seek to life such a lifestyle just because he or she wants to be in the "in" crowd of others who believe in what they are doing, and not merely following a fad. If they don't believe in what they are living, they make a mockery of it for those that do choose that direction.

For me, Gor is a fantasy because it can only be a fantasy. It's a fantasy that I love, in heart, soul and mind. While I may apply a few Gorean principles in how I conduct my life in the real world, the whole of Gor is a place that I can only access through the online world because of my circumstances, but my seriousness and love of Gor is not diminished by the fact that I cannot kneel in real life to a master and feel the true sting of a whip.

I must live my Gorean life then vicariously through my online character.

I have only been two characters in my well-beyond a decade in this world. The first, Talena, while there were indeed some wonderful Gorean experiences, I never fully reaped the true experience until years down the road when I was owned by a man named Sirius, or rather, even before I had been placed in his collar; the fires igniting when I first spied him and saw a man who knew well how to handle a slave. It was devastating to lose him, when the real world took him away after the death of one of his sons. Perhaps I could have continued in the growth of Talena had there been frees in the home I was living in that I truly saw as a capable master. The home was too much mush-and-squish, where slaves were coddled like children.

While Talena had been placed on a shelf of emptiness, I had ventured to another realm where I had known another of Gor. Though the venue was not Gorean, it was seeded with Gorean philosophy, but in a more whimsical manner. It kept my love for Gor alive, while myself as Talena felt stagnant. I should have left the home then at that point, continued on elsewhere in Gor, but I had hopes that Sirius would return.

Additionally, to help keep my love of Gor alive and burning, I immersed myself in my books, jotted down notes, worked on my website, a site which is offered to those who cannot afford to purchase the books, though neigher do I offer illegal copies of downloadable books nor do I support any who would. What I do offer are links to Fictionwise, which offers the legal e-book versions, as well as sites that sell in used books. Even still, in my research, I learn each time I open a book, and I study that new knowledge, embrace it and devour it.

With the other non-Gorean home closed down when two of our crucial members passed away, I was in an emotional quandry; I wanted Gor back, and mourned not being a part of Gor, but I could not be Talena anymore. If I left my home, I would be no doubt losing friends I had been around for 8, 9 years, because I felt there would be many who would not understand. I would hurt them, and that was something I didn't want to do.

Ultimately, I did leave, realizing that people that I thought I knew were far different than the people they truly were. I brought Ayelen -- and myself again -- to Gor where she (and myself) without a doubt belonged. It has not been easy this past year, but I am glad it hasn't been. I have grown so much in spirit and heart, in soul and mind, with each passing day spent. I have enjoyed the hands of good firm masters, though sadly, for one reason or another they departed Gor; I have endured the hands of a man who could truly be a great firm master, but his intentions were merely to find women to satisfy him sexually in the real world. I have been forced to look deep into my very being, to learn about myself right to the very core. Every day, I learn something new, be it from an experience online, or picking up a book and re-reading it. The day I stop learning, will be the day I no longer exist.

I am now owned by a man who is incredible, who takes my breath away, who frightens me, thrills me. He is without a doubt Gorean; his hand is firm, his temper easy, malevolent, and he expects nothing but perfection. He molds me as he wants me to be as his slave. He does not coddle. He may from time to time show affection or smile even. He is strict, stern, unrelenting. Each day spent he teaches me yet something new he expects of me; he helps teach me something new about myself. When I meet with his displeasure, I cry real tears, my heart lurches and aches, my stomach tightens into knots; not simply writing words that I am crying, or feeling an ache. When I find myself in a quandry of not understanding something, it is to him I direct myself to help me understand.

My Master too, does not live the lifestyle in his real life, because of circumstances of various factors. He, too, feels his anger, his passion, and all those other emotions within himself, not simply his character in roleplay.

Those like us are called "Soulplayers;" those who cannot live the lifestyle in the real world, but feels the life in heart, mind and soul and while in roleplay, consumes, fears, aches, and all those other emotions beyond the scope of a computer monitor.

I also think, that since I can only live this beautiful world of Gor in fantasy online, it makes it that more special to me.

 

 

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Special Note

Because of the differences in publishing the books, depending upon whether published in the U.S. or Europe, depending upon whether a first publishing or a Masquerade Books release, page numbers will often vary. All of my quotes are from original, first-printing U.S. publications (see The Books page for a listing of publishers and dates) with the exception of the following books:

  • Tarnsman of Gor (2nd Printing, Balantine)
  • Outlaw of Gor (11th Printing, Balantine)
  • Priest-Kings of Gor (2nd Printing, Balantine)
  • Assassin of Gor (10th Printing, Balantine)
  • Raiders of Gor (15th Printing, Balantine)
  • Captive of Gor (3rd Printing, Balantine)

Disclaimer

These pages are not written for any specific home, but rather as informational pages for those not able to get ahold of the books and read them yourself. Opinions and commentaries are strictly my own personal views, therefore, if you don't like what you are reading — then don't. The information in these pages is realistic to what is found within the books. Many sites have added information, assuming the existences of certain products and practices, such as willowbark and agrimony for healing, and travel to earth and back for the collection of goods. I've explored the books, the flora, the fauna, and the beasts, and have compiled from those mentioned, the probabilities of certain practices, and what vegetation mentioned in the books is suitable for healing purposes, as well as given practicalities to other sorts of roleplaying assumptions.