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Issues for Today's Woman

DISCLAIMER: PLEASE BE ADVISED that the contents of this page are sensitive and may be offensive or overly sensitive for some. Issues on this page deal with physical, verbal and emotional abuse, health issues, stalking, et al.

Today's woman is filled with lots of wonderful things, but a lot of bad things too. Far too long has society allowed women to be battered and abused. As a survivor of an abusive husband, I know just how hard and frustrating it can be — frightening.

I spent many years a prisoner to his manipulations and abuse, although mostly verbal/emtional, but still they cut just as much as a real knife. His violence did at times extend to physical, and I was lucky enough to escape with my health — and my life — intact, but there are many women who do not. I remember being slammed into walls as if I were a stuffed toy; I remember sitting in the bathroom and watching in horror as he threw a hammer at me, missing me (barely) and shattering the glass shower door next to me, feeling the chards of glass fall on top of me. I remember hating him, as well as fearing him, as he forced me to clean up the bathroom, not caring about the glass embedded throughout my flesh; I remember the fear and hate I felt the time he placed a loaded gun to my temple — and not just on one occasion. Finally, after a 48 reign of terror, held at gunpoint, in which he relentlessly throughout those seemingly endless hours, attempted with his foul words to demean my existence, I gathered my courage and started my plans for my permanent escape. It took a few years in planning and saving, but eventually it came to fruition and I remember the immense joy I felt when the judge granted my divorce.

Though the laws are out there to protect us, unfortunately the laws are only as good as the legal personnel you must deal with. For me, I was stuck in a small desert town with wannabe police officers and a judicial system that was rather archaic. After my divorce and had moved to a new place, my ex-husband had moved, temporarily, out of state. Unable to make a living there, he returned, to sleeping in his truck on the block where I lived. He would prowl around outside my home. One night, a neighbor called the police, who knocked on my door, wanting me to provide him with at least a blanket and some pity. One of my daughters stood at the door with me, and though we emphatically made it known to the officers that he was a violent menace not to be pitied, I was still the bad guy in their eyes.

I've provided a few links for those who may need help or know a friend who does.


Stop the Violence


Stop Abuse


Stop the Violence: V-Day


Sunrise House: Addiction Among Women


Grief is something that is a part of everyday life, and sometimes we all need help in how to deal with it, especially when it comes to having to help a child deal with grief. I have been blessed so far in my life but I know those that have. Here are a few links that hopefully will help any with particular needs.


The Compassionate Friends Network

Health for today's woman is something of great concern. The rise of breast cancer is enormous! But, we are also lucky as breast cancer is one of three types of cancer that is screenable. Other cancers of importance for women, which are also screenable, are cervical cancer and colon cancer. Here are some resources for you to check out.


Breast Cancer Resources


American Medical Women's Association




Child abuse statistics are staggering. It's shameful and terrifying. And it can be stopped. Please, if you or anyone you know needs help, please contact these resources and save the life of an innocent child today and stop the cycle!

Pandora's Box: The Secrecy of Child Sexual Abuse


Think your personal information is safe?

Not long ago, I was doing some legal research for my boss on the internet. He had given me a URL to check out. It turned out to be the wrong URL, however, doing a search on Google, and typing in the company name (or what he thought was the company name) brought up something that caught my eye. I delved further, and further, each page opening up something more and more terrifying. I was literally a shaking leaf by the time I had reached far into the depths. Does the name Amy Boyer ring a bell for any? If you live in the NE portion of the US, it might be more of a bell-ringer. Amy Boyer was murdered by a kid in her class who was fatally obsessed by her. Okay, that happens a lot. But what is the frightening part of this story, is what her murderer did to accomplish his goal.

He obtained personal information on her via an internet company that sold such information. These companies require nothing — except money — to provide this information. They do not require a background investigation on the person inquiring. They do not require reasonable need of the person inquiring. Just try walking into a private investigator's office and telling them you want them to get you the down and dirty on Joe Schmoe. First, you have to prove to them you are on the up and up.

Read the haunting story of Amy Boyer and her murder. I have listed here three sites. One concerns the legal implications of companies who provide personal information to anyone who asks for it. There are many such companies online, offering to provide you, for a nominal fee, information such as employer, social security number, et al, of someone you seek. After Amy Boyer's death, the New Hampshire Supreme Court broke new ground by finding that a Florida company, Docusearch.com may be held liable for the personal information it sold to a client over the Internet when that client used the information to trace and murder New Hampshire resident Amy Boyer.

The murderer, Liam Youens, had been a classmate of Ms. Boyer, where he had developed an obsession about her. As his obsession turned fatally destructive, he maintained a website dedicated to his murderous fantasies towards Ms. Boyer. He sought her out, but was unable to locate her phone number or work address, where she would be approachable by Youens. The second site listed is the mirror of this website.

And lastly, the third site is the poignant dedication of Amy by her parents.

*  Electronic Privacy Information Center
*  Get Inside the Mind of a Killer: A Reproduction of Liam Youen's Amy Boyer website
      (mirrored on the day he died)
*  A Dedication to Amy Boyer by her Parents
"He who fights with monsters might take care lest he thereby become a monster. And if you gaze for long into an abyss, the abyss gazes also into you." — Friedrich Nietzsche, Beyond Good and Evil, Aphorism 146 *
The star on my pages was a graphic that I made personally in 1994 when I was first learning how to do animations. This star has been a standard on my Rattt Trap pages since their creation in 1994; specifically my newsletter pages, The Back Fence. *